Damned Swamp’s CDC STD Dental Dams

DC 101’s talk show got into new products on the market for fighting an epidemic of STDs due to wanton oral sex in the Swamp & my research came up with the CDC’s "helpful" ideas for properly using “dental dams”. But, after the waffling of CDC during the pandemic ...

As the CDC’s website notes, “dental dams are latex or polyurethane sheets used between the vagina or anus during oral sex” and can “be purchased online.” Wonderful. What will they think of next? Although, as the Bible says, there’s nothing new under the sun and I wouldn’t be surprised if the Sodomites didn’t have something akin to these modern prophylactics, only they probably called them “personalized wine skins.”

Among the sage advice given by the CDC is to “make sure there are no tears or defects” in the dental dam and shove it in your vagina or anus before starting you know what. No kidding. And, oh, “DON’T reuse a dental dam” or “stretch it as this can cause it to tear.” Yes. Yes. As the parable said, people in Biblical times didn’t pour new wine into old wineskins; if they did, the skins would burst, the wine would run out and the wineskins would be ruined. How helpful was this updated CDC advice? How many people died from Covid with the CDC’s website at their finger-tips? If Dr. Fauci were asked by MSNBC, might he brush off any suggestion “abstinence” aka keeping one’s lips zipped might be another solution to the DC oral sex problem & yet again say something obviously blithering like, “You know, we can’t have loose lips sinking our ships.”

Davd Soul