Real Men Eat Cigars & Real Americans Don’t Panic Over Trump’s Chinavirus

Real men really do eat cigars. Social media is rife with naysayers who warn it would “poison” a human. But, I’ve seen it. Others have too. Wrote one debater: “I was just watching “The Good, The Bad and The Ugly,” and I saw Tuco chewing a full cigar…But, tell me, is this even possible?” Replied a horrified witness, “Yes, I’ve seen a man eat his cigar, AND THERE WAS NO SPITTOON!”

Leave it to this blog to settle the controversy once and for all. Indeed, many moons ago, I was riding a Chicago commuter train and also saw an old timer in the seat next to me whip out a Churchill sized stogie bigger than a banana. I assumed the man just wanted to hold the tobacco missile in his mouth before lighting up when he got off at his stop. Yet, lo and behold, when I glanced over at him 5 minutes later, the cigar was a quarter pounder smaller. Five minutes later, it was a Big Mac smaller. By the time we reached the train terminal in the Windy City’s downtown, the Whopper was GONE.

The cigar eater must have had a cast iron stomach. I still almost regurgitate my breakfast thinking of his habit, may be scarred for life. But, just wanted to share this pressing health issue to put the War on the Chinese Virus in perspective for President Trump’s “panickers”. Maybe let's use a little common sense in all things, big and small.

Davd Soul